Finding the Balance….

 

We accord education the highest priority in our lives but are we mentally tuned to understand the purpose of education. Education happens within the walls and without. While one must admit that in reality, scores in the Boards makes an impact. The indian education system is content heavy Every child is expected to master the basics of the pre-designed curriculum..The importance given to examination and marks for entry to higher education and degrees has led to rote- learning.

But what stops one from exploring all possibilities of experimentation, exploration, inquisitiveness all through one’s learning?.The joy, the curiosity, the wonder has to kept alive if learning has to happen. One has to help children to strike a perfect balance between academic skills, aptitude and natural skills and abilities required for life. Learning is a process and it has to be life=centred. The primary axiom of education is parents and educators must have the same vision and mission. The bond between the two has to be one one of understanding, trust and faith.

How do we as parents and educators go about this? Let’s prepare our children for tomorrow. Schools have to prepare for the future. There are shifts in learning. We must plan for the change. Change is visible more in urban areas so parents need to gear too for the change. Those who follow the educational scenario closely will be seeing the winds of change – from academics to holistic education, from exam orientation to learning oriented and from content to skill based. Digital and communication technology has helped students to acquire more knowledge. But, are they able to apply the knowledge gained in day to day experiences? During my visits to schools in Europe, I had opportunities to observe students and teachers closely and one conclusion that I could draw was that they do only one thing at a time and any two tasks /instructions left them very confused and tensed. This is unlike Indian students in general and Sulonians in particular. Today, it is very important to encourage our students to handle a few instructions and perform tasks at the same time without feeling the stress. . That’s multi-tasking.

While on ICT, there’s an increasing trend for schools to go for smart -boards. It is a hype and trendy to say “we are smart -board users”. Infusing technology is a good sign for development, it can be an aid or complement the teacher. While technology helps students’ understanding and acquisition of knowledge, one must use wisdom to understand the needs of children in the primary school. Children need interactions with their teacher, they need their warmth and love. Curriculum design and delivery differs from one school to another .A ready-made program dished out by an external source will make us “programmed teachers”. One size can’t fit all. It will kill the initiative, enthusiasm and creativity of teachers. Hence, it is detrimental to the growth and development of the school. We must cultivate what is there, not lose it. Wonder, curiosity ,desire to know, spontaneity has to be kindled. Real and vitual classrooms must co-exist. We must ‘de-program” .

We must help our students to strike a balance between their natural aptitude and a cultivated passions. The point of intersection between the aptitude and passion would give them success and will help to strike the work-life balance, so essential for all of us. Only educators and parents can make that happen .

 

A Tribute……

As the toddler grows, he explores more and more of the world. He does so with exuberance and a quiet confidence because he knows that a loved one continues to watch over his shoulder. From the dizzying heights of unparalleled success to the disappointment of not meeting one’s
expectations, that child makes it through thick and thin thanks to the unshakeable pillar of support and encouragement he can always fall back upon. Most attribute the success to the adoring, encouraging adult- dad/mom/grandparent who stands over the toddler’s shoulder holding his hand and willing him on.

For Singhania School, that someone has been Shri B.K. Kediaji. Many of us have seen him presiding over award functions and special occasions. Still others have known him as a guiding force in the Singhania School boardroom, shaping the future of one of India’s finest institutions. But few actually know of the blood, sweat and tears that Kediaji shed to make the school what it is today. His passing away yesterday is a great loss not only to the Raymond family and myself, but to each and every one of us. Why? Because as we race towards the many goals we have set ourselves, we can suddenly no longer see that encouraging loved one from the corner of our eye.We must not however, stop, pause, sob and lose hope. We must at this moment, honour his work and the potential that he saw in each and every one of us, when he helped  Late Shri Gopalkrishna Singhaniaji set up this institution in what was then just wilderness outside Bombay. We must aspire to be the karma yogi that he was, a self-motivated duty-giving person always willing to stand up for what is right. As the 9th couplet of Chapter 3 of the Bhagavad Gita puts it so beautifully:

yajnarthat karmano ’nyatra loko ’yam karma-bandhanah|
tad-artham karma kaunteya mukta-sangah samacara ||

Competition, cooperation and self dedication are three paths to make a life fulfilling. For one to rise from one’s basest instincts to social life and then to a ethical/spiritual plane, one has to transition from competition through cooperation to self dedication, which involves offering one’s best for the welfare of others. This salutary action is contained in Yajna, doing one’s work as an offering for societal benefit. Shri Kediaji was an embodiment of the spirit of self-dedication, the same spirit that fills the hallowed portals of our institution even today.

It is said that to the world you are often just one person, but to one person, you can be the world. Kediaji meant the world to the Singhania School family. We miss him dearly. May his soul rest in peace.

God Bless!.

p.s. This is a tribute to Shri. B. K. Kediaji, Vice-Chairman, Board of Governors, whose demise yesterday has left a void, which cannot be filled.

Get, Set and Go..!

With the Board exams just round the corner, students are likely to feel the heat, even if they are fairly well prepared. Naturally so! Considering the fact that the marks card determines their entry into a institute and course of their choice, students must have a very scientific approach to learning. So, what does it take to reach the top?

There are a few ingredients that would help students with the recipe for success. They are self-confidence, good planning, hard -work, determination, grit with an indomitable spirit to give one’s best, positive attitudes, good health and cheer and the will -do spirit.

There are 30 days on hand for preparation and that’s a lot of time to work wonders provided each student decides for himself his goal. The action plan has be prepared by the student himself, keeping in mind the subjects that he needs to concentrate on, the number of hours of work that he would be putting in apart from what would be the percentage he aims for. To dream without an action plan and serious work in the direction is meaningless.

During the month long preparatory holidays, one must be cautioned about procrastination. It is very comfortable to excuse oneself and promise to catch up with the planned time-table, when one misses the schedule but one should refrain from doing so. A fire in the belly to perform well, compete with the best, put in more than a 100% effort is essential.

Students go through frustration, anger and even aggression at home. They may be the result of fear, self-pity, pressure and expectations. As parents, one must let go – because they really do not know how to handle their emotions. So, it would be very comforting if we could chat with them and go brisk walks which will help them to unwind..A balanced diet, good sleep and a relaxed frame of mind will help them concentrate better.

Believe in the best of intentions, of efforts, and work hard and the best will come back.

The Day and Year that was….

It is exactly a year back, on the 1st of Jan 2011, that I  had the opportunity of interacting with a Nobel laureate and scientist Prof. Venkatraman Ramakrishnan at the Indian Science Congress (ISC) at Chennai. The mega event had Dr. Manmohan Singh, Mr. P. Chidambaram, other Union Ministers and the then Dy CM of Tamil Nadu Mr. M.K. Stalin and his cabinet colleagues apart from the special invitees and speakers – 8 Nobel Laureates including Prof Venkatraman Ramakrishnan. The security was so tight that they almost missed Prof.Ramakrishnan and I had the privilege of escorting Prof Venky Ramakrishnan from the Pandal to the auditorium. What struck me most was his humility and simplicity. He insisted on me calling him Venky and  wanted to know all about my school and my views on science education in India. When he asked me about my educational background and when I did share, he said,” I can’t believe that you have a non-science background … you almost sound like a passionate scientist”. It made my day, truly.

I gathered all the student -scientists to listen to him speak and encouraged them to ask questions, so that they would also learn a lot from Prof. Venky’s experiences. From serious scientific questions to simple personal questions that the students asked him, he attended to each one of them patiently. He just enjoyed being with the students and spent time asking questions about their projects. He neither had any airs about him nor did he expect people to be on attendance for him. When the young student -scientists came back to thank me for giving them an opportunity for such an informal interaction, I asked them what they had to say about the experience and the learning. Pat came the replies – Simple, involved, humble, cheerful, intellectual, informal, child-friendly, very knowledgeable yet modest……… Today, I read he has been knighted for services to molecular biology, so I must write – Sir. Venky, You impacted young minds and I hope at least 50% of those children will opt for research.

That’s what we must live by ….simple living, high thinking. A lesson to remind ourselves time and again – We will never be known for all the riches we  have had, or the cars we drove in, nor the positions or the titles, we have or had. We will, however, be remembered for the person we have been with or without the titles. So let’s begin the New Year by adding meaning to lives of others in whatever little way we can, for that, will certainly add meaning to our lives. A year after the ISC 2011 at Chennai, when I ask Pushpendra, the student who presented our school project, I am certain his eyes will sparkle and he will remember the Nobel laureate Prof Venky Ramakrishnan now Sir Venky first and his own recognition later. Children need these kinds of exposure to know what they should grow up to be like. Children learn well by observation. They learn how they can be by interacting with people who have made a mark in their respective fields -from home to science /IT /technology . They also observe people minutely and pledge that they would never repeat the mistakes made them. That is the wisdom we get from education.

So when enter the field of education, let’s remember to keep out our egos, positions, money , power, negativity out ( just as we leave our footwear outside a place of worship). Let’s hold Education at a high pedestal giving it the sanctity it truly deserves. We will make a great country and a greater Universe.

Here’s wishing all my readers a joyous and a peaceful year ahead.

What Kids Don’t Say

As parents of two year olds, one is amused by the non-stop chatter, be it words or half-sentences and when the little moppet grows to be a four year old, one is  amazed by the expressions and the narrative skills. Kids have a lot to say -from what happened at school, with friends, at the garden, at play. They also ask for things, express desires, share experiences and express views. All of these happen very gradually, depending on the age and the relationship one may share.

What kids say gives us a peep into their personalities, their temperament, their attitudes, their aspirations, their desires. When the thought, the word, the action are in a perfect tangent, one can assume that the child is contented and secure and that he has a clear vision and has his route marked clearly. What is more vital is what kids don’t say . When kids don’t say what and when they have to, one needs to delve deep within to search for answers. We won’t know if the kid needs help. Remedial intervention is essential in such cases.

Many of our present day problems with kids are pertaining to acquired perception, not their own conviction. Kids need to ask questions and we must clarify, in order to avoid mis-guidance. Today, when kids have innumerable sources to access information, we must be there to help them filter and give direction. Kids don’t say that they need to take on a few responsibilities, they don’t say that they want to work on their academics independently, they don’t express their emotions, they don’t say they like to be consulted when the family makes a decision, they don’t say that they would like to sing though they know they aren’t good at that. They don’t say that they want to sit with you and have a chat on world issues. Kids don’t say that they dislike a tense situation or anger, envy and jealousy, they don’t like being compared to others. I often have children especially the adolescents and the seniors who write in a one liner saying -I need to talk to you. They get an appointment right away. I often catch up with them on the grounds, at picnics and speaking to them on a one to one basis gives me a great understanding of how and why of everything.

At school, project group work, music, dance, sport, tours, competitions give them a vista for developing skills-set. If kids access games that challenges them dangerously, we need to ask ourselves, are we not providing opportunities for  problem solving and decision -making for them to prove their mettle? We could do that at home as well by putting them in situations. For e.g. you are going to be away at work and kids are on a vacation and the electrician, the plumber, the maid, the cook all have to complete their work. The kids need to go to play too. Under these circumstances, can we ask the  kids to manage their time effectively and also decide on who will come when. They then can be told to coordinate with the concerned people. The responsibility and multi-tasking leads to greater self-confidence and higher self -esteem. It also builds the faith and trust in the family.

 

It is a proven fact that family is the only institution that not only lays a very strong foundation for shaping of the minds and ethical living but is also the cause and the effect for habits, perceptions and attitudes of the children. The environment too plays a role in supporting them but the power of the family is inexplicable. Some traits are hereditary, some acquired but almost all are consciously adopted by observing behavior and perceptions at home. That is why we do come across a few children as young as six or seven years old, having a very cynical perception or being intolerant towards everything around. When we meet the parents, we know why. Hence, it is very important for every family member to be cheerful, sound positive, take on challenges in life with a smile and always look for the silver lining. Our children will grow up to be just that.

What kids say is important but what kids don’t say is more important.

Sporty Lessons

There’s a great sense of joy when I see children playing games in the open. There are three reasons for this. One, it really takes me back to my childhood. Two, it has become a rarity in a metro city, where open spaces are few and three it is uncommon, for children to have time beyond their umpteen classes, be it a hobby or an academic support one. I recall my childhood, where evenings meant cycling, playing group games, some indoor games especially on rainy days. The Sunday afternoons are still sketched vividly in my memory. Those were hot afternoons in Delhi and it meant staying indoors playing games with friends. Ice-cold rasna and slices of juicy, sweet water-melon was the icing on the cake.

Much of what we learn in B-Schools is about managing our life and people around us. I think the best classroom ever, would be the sports –ground. The skills of Communication, agility, collaboration, critical thinking, strategic management, initiative, decision-making all come easily to any one in a sports field. That is the reason that the best friends are the one we have played with..For a child, these skills, which are also the best of lessons for life are gained from the sports field. Let’s take the a few games - golf, table -tennis, lawn tennis etc, one has to keep one’s eye on the ball. If one loses sight of the target, one would get off-mark(FOCUS). If you look at the line you are drawing rathe than the end – point your line is bound to be a little slanting. So, be it in sports, academics, or any other pursuit, focus is most important.

Mr. Adille Sumariwala, an Olympian and an Arjuna Awardee, while addressing the parents and students at our school remarked “Practice does not make a man perfect” “It is perfect practice that makes a man perfect”. He spoke about how academics and sports complement each other and helps the child to be an achiever. Resting on past laurels does reach us to our destination. Being over-confident about oneself too is disastrous. One does not know what team we are playing against in tomorrow’s match, so one needs to keep perfecting. He cited the example of the game of football, where there’s collaboration, problem-solving, decision- making, critical -thinking and communication skills that one learns. One learns to have spot strategies to win the game. All in a matter of seconds with the team members.

While training the students of our school in the art of fielding, Mr. Jonty Rhodes, the world’s best fielder, spoke on stamina, physical fitness and techniques. At the end of each day’s day training, he summarized all that he demonstrated or trained them about and asked the students questions. He ended his session each day by saying – “Go home and write down the points so that you will remember it always”. This is a lesson of recapitulation which is essential after every lesson.

Earlier in the year, when Mike Powell spoke to our children about following the game passionately, hard work and belief in one-self, he laid the foundation for the thought process on passion and focus.

Today, as I sat watching the KG children perform at their Sports Day, I recalled the messages given by these sports-persons all specialized in different sport but had the same message – Keep the focus on. It teaches us more than what one sees on the field. They are life-lessons. Today, I was  awestruck by the ease with which the 4 and 5 year olds conducted the event from the start to finish, with the 8 year – olds comparing and managing the event independently. Is this not what 20 year olds learn in an event-management course?

There is more to playing sports than just running, hitting a ball or winning trophies. Sports are the perfect analogy for life. It teaches us to focus, provides self-discipline, gives joy and prepares us for life. Keep your eye on your target, for the success that you desire.

What is Right Is Not Always Popular……

When I spoke to my children at school about addiction to social networking sites, I didn’t know I was rocking the boat and creating a storm of sorts. While advancement in technology is welcome, one must be cautious about addiction – be it for an adult or a child. While it is certainly a wonderful way to keep in touch with friends and relatives from across the globe and posting them with updates about oneself , one must have the maturity to ward -off unwanted acquaintances/friends with dishonorable intentions. Are our kids mature enough to handle difficult situations? Do they have the wisdom to choose between the wanted and the unwanted?

My concern is  – Children losing out on their childhood earlier than necessary. Over- dramatization of trivial matters, fabrication of happenings to be in news, tagging of pictures, revealing too much of oneself, carrying others real and imaginary fears on oneself …………takes its toll. We see teens with poor listening skills, inability to socialize, unwillingness to attend family functions and festivities, strong mood swings, impatience, lack of cheer, withdrawal symptoms, physical and verbal aggression. Much of this is a result of their inability to handle and balance their commitments. If they analyze their activities during the day over a period of time, they will see a pattern – a list of time- wasters. That’s what one needs to consciously keep away from. This is also for children into gaming -addiction of every kind is dangerous.
One needs to apply moderation.

If  we are able to get the children to just enjoy and  pursue a  hobby, be it a sport, music, dance or, painting, just because he likes it, not because he has to be a pro at it, we will be able to give them a  direction. As a family, you could help them to discuss ideas, and  wean them away from  discussing people..Our kids will then be great thinkers, writers and doers, who  feel very positive about themselves all the time-  even amidst challenges. The cheer, joy and confidence would bring radiance to the face, a twinkle in the eye and a bounce in one’s stride. Isn’t this what we want in our kids – bliss.  Yes, it is not going to be easy but it is not impossible either. As it is said -What is popular may not be right and what is right may not be popular.

Apropos the article regarding Facebook deactivation that appeared in a prominent newspaper with some apparent ” quotes”, I wish to highlight a critical issue – the lack of checks and balances in the newspaper’s editorial team and work ethics. The reporter had neither interviewed me in person nor spoke over phone !!!!!!! The blog summarizes my interaction with my kids. We reach out because they are dear and we care.